And thus the same brain monkey hobbies remain
I was convinced I'd have quit the hobbies I'm embarrassed of to actually do something more "worthwhile" and "productive" by now, but I'm really having to come to terms with the fact that these things are impossible to eradicate from myself because I don't have anything else as easy and pleasurable as these hobbies; so I will probably have them till the day I die. Romance comics are literally necessary for my peace of mind and functioning as a human being. This fact embarrasses me deeply, especially as an aroace person who has even tried to opt out of gender at this point. And yet the brain monkeys remain. The monkeys celebrate tired old tropes that may be regressive if they scratch an itch. I don't know what to say about this other than that I know I need to accept these parts as just who I am, I'll never be "smart" or "scholarly" or "accomplished", and the world will never catch up and show me only progressive comics in enough numbers to change my monkeys; so the biases of society shall remain, and even strangely bring me comfort, on a daily basis.
It's interesting because every now and then I will find something that brings forth a new monkey that celebrates healthier relationships and more diversity, and I will be like, holy shit, this is actually what i wanted rather than all of the previous stuff, and then inevitably, one of two things:
- The thing is not entirely that progressive either, just that the bar was underground. Now it is maybe at ground level with new troubling biases -- see villainess / isekai / regression, which let their female protagonists do more instead of pining for the love and respect of inconsiderate male leads (see older shoujo like Itazura Kiss and isekai like Red River and Fushigi Yuugi, which required active suffering of physical and sexual assault for the female protagonist's eventual success) at the cost of introducing things such as:
- Escapism into becoming the capitalist ideal of unattainable perfectionism. This is a cope for losing in your real life as a replaceable worker cog, and yet none of the protagonists want to develop worker consciousness. Capitalism is okay as long as you're the one on top with with knowledge that is impossible for anyone else in the world to have due to some literal god's blessing.
- Everyone is magically beautiful or else they're not an important character, which was a thing before, but is now written into the laws of the world itself
- Embracing of whiteness with nearly all European settings. I know East Asian readers like me still basically read them as Asian anyway because we're so used to being the default in manga and webtoons (like if they adapt any of this to real people mediums I fully expect to see Asian actors just with dyed hair), but the very fact of being transported into a "beautiful" body that is supposedly White European and that being a prerequisite to having happiness should honestly give more pause than it does.
- Exporting imperialism and colonialist mindsets, such as putting down rebellions and killing beasts that are somehow not a vital part of the ecosystem
- Wholehearted embracing of nobility and the class system, to the point where 5-year-olds can discipline their adult maids...
- The thing is truly that rare and the effect wears off because there isn't enough material to offset the old neuro-pathways built on society's typical drudgery. In the end, what is more readily prolific and accessible wins. This is like how people believe a fact the more they are exposed to it, regardless of whether there ever is any data backing it up. I am not immune to propaganda, etc., etc.
One can only hope the long term trends will continue to improve, but it's probably unlikely. Things will almost certainly regress again at some point, anyway, since human society is never linear and utopia is unattainable.
...So anyway. I'm stuck here, I guess.